Like the supreme court ruling, Whizzit is a a bit overdue with its trenchant commentary about marriage. If others choose to have a no-sex marriage, it doesn’t mean you have to.
Tag: Whizzit
Conscious Uncoupling
Whizzit did some amazing detective work to discover the real reason for the failure of Gwyneth and Chris’s marriage. She was doing it with Iron Man. Man, that’s a cold-play.
Happy Turkey Day!
This may be the last year you can enjoy your turducken stuffed with twinkies. No, not because of the Hostess™ bankruptcy, but because the world is ending on December 21, 2012. Some ancient, mystical, savage, unscientific people (republicans?) thought so, so it must be true. Didn’t anyone see that terrible movie about it? I think it was called The Hangover 2 .
Helen Keller Superstar Featuring Ray J
March Madness
A Dollar Short
Here’s some real Chuck Norris trivia.
- Did you know that “Walker, Texass Ranger” was actually on the air for nine seasons?
- Chuck Norris is 1/8th Cherokee. This has nothing to do with ancestry, the man ate a fucking Indian.
- You know what, just click here.
Blown Opportunity
For the first time ever, I’m confused by Whizzit and have several questions.
- Is he planning on performing cunnilingus on his girlfriend at a red light or, as is normally customary, have her blow him?
- How long are traffic lights in Whizzitland?
- Do ambulances in Whizzitville let whores do ride-a-longs so they never have to stop?
- Isn’t Trinidad, CO, the trans-gender capital of the U.S.? What does this imply?
Vice Presidential Privilege
California Dreamin’
Fortunately for the Whizzit protagonist, he happened upon John Phillips’ grave. I can only assume he’ll be on Oprah next week to discuss it.
Up The Ass Without a Paddle
I call bullshit on Whizzit. What, you say? How is that possible? Look at the clues.
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Salida means exit in Spanish.
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Prostate exams were not common in the 50’s.
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The butt plug is missing from Mr. Whizzit’s ass.
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Sad, lonely tear.
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Mr. Whizzit would need more than a knife to get a date.