Rumour (a British rumor) has it that the Trump pee tape is not real. However, there is something much worse on tape (think underage girl(s)) that we will all see soon. I’m hoping it’s as sexy as Baby Louie CK’s stripper. Please note the date on this post as leaks are coming and America is about to take one big crap in its pants.
Category: Comic
Masturbate Cakeshop v. Colorado
Thank god for the recent MAGA supreme court ruling. We can now openly discriminate against the blind. It’s about time as those non-seeing fuckers have been getting far too many advantages and it must stop! Also, it’ll be a cold day in hell before I ever decorate a cake for a left-handed person!
Summer Blockbuster (Get off of my lawn, dinosaur)
Once upon a time, there were summer movies that weren’t about super heroes. Here’s a list the lighthearted movies we enjoyed in our youth before the onslaught of Robert Downey Jr.
- Movies about sharks
- Dinosaurs
- Phone challenged aliens
- Runs made by cannonballs
- Girls who drove tanks
- Returns to Lagoons (that happened to be blue)
- Pauly Shore
- Kazaam
- Dwarf Planet Nash
- Lolita
- Tails that Tom Cruise wanted to cock
Twin Peaks
Zuckerbaby
It is really time that Zuck gets hauled in front of congress again to explain FaceBook’s fetal algorithms. I’m relatively positive that he’s been tracking everything from amniotic viscosity to blastopore density.
The Late Saint Patrick
Just like leprechauns, this comic is chronically late. Much like all the leprecahun’s girlfriends, and mistresses and pots of gold. That’s right, leprechauns like to fuck pots of gold. Google it.
Droppin’ a deuce
I’d say Squiggles has a problem with Ron Jeremy. Butt width a star this luminescent, this is not a problem. Now go out and enjoy your moist Holiday Scumballs topped off with some Raunch Dressing.
Schweddy Balls
#MeTwo
There’s nothing funny about sexual harassment or assault but you can make fun of the names!
Donald (up the) Trump, Bill Cli(toris)nton, James Franco (and Beans), Casey (at the bat) Affleck, Paul Haggis (and blood pudding), Ben Vereen (off the straight and narrow), Morgan Spu(tom)rlock, Tavis (won’t make you) Smiley, (S)Heath Evans, Marshall Faulk (me or die), Mario (cock and) Batali, Dustin (your ass) Hoffman, Oliver Stone (hard), Roy (what is your) Price, Harvey Weinstein, Matt (muncher) Lauer, Kevin (sex in) Spacey, Garrison Keillor (when I was done), Louis CK (my cock).
Expectorance of Things Passed
This book was written by Proust. Apparently he was allergic to Petite madeleines which set him off on this tome. Remembrance of Things Passed out My Nose. Is it solipsistic in here, or is it just me?