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Bracket Busted

Since Kyrie is a flat earther, how cum his shots are affected by gravity? And what’s on the other side? He did say that he’s going to walk off the edge to prove us all wrong. He’ll come around…

Fat Ass Tuesday

Dinosaur Doctor

Everyday Tuesday is Fat Tuesday when you’re an extinct species. A little known fact about the meteor that canceled dinosaurs is that it struck the earth on Ash Wednesday.

New Year’s Resolution – No Long Pigs

With the new year come all the tedious resolutions. This year, I resolve to smoke more weed and eat less…human. Doing well so far, but we’ll see what February brings as that is when I normally get hungrier. Or maybe that’s the bhang? In either case, I guess I should just Packer it in already.

MCCGA (CC is for Cunty Christmas)

Rest in Pieces

This holiday season if you’re out getting stocking stuffers, make sure to pick up that special something that really could use some stuffing. Mike Lindell’s MyRectum. 50% off with proof you attended the Jan 6 rally.

Anuopening

Dinosaur Doctor

Chess has never been sexier. Except maybe when Bobby Fischer pulled it out. Bird’s opening that is. Imagine when future tournaments require cavity searches. I’d really like to watch “The Queen’s Gambit” then.

Happy Heil O Ween

George Bassett

With all the relevant previous examples, Prince Harry, Harry Hamlin, Harry Styles, J.K. Rowling. I’m going to go out on a limb and guess Nazi Kitty’s name is Harry.

Stay safe and make sure to check for Zyklon B in your candy this year. There’s rumors that several wingers are hiding it in Kit Kats this year.

Marine Usury

You don’t often see sharks fighting octopi because they are well armed. At least they do have a few extra arms and/or legs to give up.

RIP Deb. Hope you’re watching “Loan Shark Tale” up there.

Don’t Bite the Hand That Pays You

George Bassett

Strangely, George’s owner was not mad about George’s blatant racism. She was upset about George questioning International Monetary Policy. As the IMF and the US Federal Reserve have shown us, they are so good at what they do, they are beyond questioning. [Our Soros sponsored Patreon donation should be clearing soon.]

The Great Seduction Part Deux

Our eternal friend is back. As self reflective as a vampire can be. We all breathlessly await part III wherein Lorcan and Rian fight to the death over who gets to deposit fiat currency at the sperm bank.

Extreme Loquacity

Seems like Chantix™ is coming for all the greats. It took four years to get Ray Liotta. So Stephen King still has time to pump out about 75 additional books before it gets him. Plus, he’ll have more time now that he’s off the cock-pipe.